“She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her, And happy are all who hold her fast.” -Proverbs 3:18


Awakening the Goddess within is what ultimately set me on my course. I had no clue what awakening even meant at the time. What I thought I was doing and what actually happened are two different things. I thought I was cracking Solomons’ code not embarking on a spiritual journey.

For me, true alchemy was the transmutation of selfish sexual energy into a living spiritual practice. Much of what I’ve experienced through meditation is the result of my genuine desire to transform. I was a bad man who had done more than a little harm. I believe it was my desire to turn my will and my life over to God that led me towards the mystical path.

As Sophe awakened within me she shaped, not only my understanding, but how I worship and serve God as well. It’s strange to conceive of, but most of the allegories I uncovered in the scriptures seemed to just jump out at me. I would be reading a particular story when the realization of a deeper spiritual truth would be revealed. “Wisdom, the artisan of all, taught me.” Why? Because I meditated on Gods word with all of my heart.

Now, I must confess, I practiced Buddhism for years because I am an ardent student of philosophy. I genuinely believe that humans should love and cherish each other whether we be strangers or family. The Buddhists have a rich history, free from violence, that teaches exactly that; a love of all things in existence.

Without a rudimentary understanding of the chakras- subtle energy centers in the body- most of the mystical teachings will seem incredibly cryptic and vague. If I were to say “construct a Temple at the Heart of the Rose and Wisdom will come” it would sound like absolute psycho-babble. However, it was that exact phrase in Mark Boothes- Secret History Of The World that led me towards my first clue in unlocking the ancient mystery. Clearly it was an allegory for how we should meditate at the heart chakra.

This is also how Western Alchemy was passed down throughout the centuries. Learning that led me to pick up the Bible and read it again.

How much of this ancient work was a metaphor?

How many of the ancient mysteries were waiting to be unlocked?

Did King Solomon really code mystical knowledge into the Wisdom books?

I began pouring through the scriptures begging God to reveal Himself to me and show me how I could serve. See, I was hungry. I wanted to know God, to have a relationship with Him. That’s how Mystical Mindstate happened. This entire website, my enrolling in seminary school to become a rehab chaplain, all of it, started with a desire to transform my narcissistic lifestyle into a spiritualized path with meaning.

Yes, the eastern traditions are rich with method after method of how one can raise their consciousness. They have detailed descriptions on how to awaken the Divine presence within. However, as a Thai monk pointed out to me years ago, I am psychologically not capable of picturing my life without God, without Christ as my savior. For 300 years the Bowden family were Methodist preachers and missionaries. I come from a long line of Christians and the faith is rooted in my DNA. I had to accept that.

Somehow I felt like I was giving up my right to study collected works of mystics by claiming my Christian heritage. Of course, this simply isn’t the case as ALL mystics from all walks of life can all agree on one thing; God is within.

The misconception came from my belief that there weren’t any mystical practices coded in the Bible. However, the Bible is riddled with allegories on how the great mystics, called Prophets, meditated, with rich descriptions on the visualization techniques they used and detailed accounts of what revelations God gave to them.

We Christians most definitely have a rich history of mysticism we should be celebrating instead of denying. Sophia lies at the Heart of that tradition. As they say, “the heart has Wisdom the head knows not.”


Woman Wisdom was well understood in Jewish mysticism. While the Tree of Life may seem like an obscure reference to tie in with Wisdom that’s because it’s true meaning is slightly lost on our modern minds. King Solomon didn’t exactly explain what he thought was common knowledge to everyone at the time.

What we’re talking about here is the alchemical process known as En Vegetalis. She is the medium used in what Gnostics called the Law of the Triangle. The mineral dimension grows from the vegetable dimension. It is possible for us to exercise a sort of mind over matter power via this “medium.”

While I understand how vague of an explanation that is the answer can be found in the ancient mysteries referenced in the quote above from the book of Wisdom.

When Solomon urges us to “seek her like silver” in Proverbs he is alluding to who Wisdom is. The Egyptian goddess Isis is linked to the silver moon and her husband Osiris was linked to the golden sun.

However, the Egyptians were incredibly short sighted and failed to grasp the true significance of Her and demeaned her to mere symbolism.

They used this knowledge to bend the material world to their will as opposed to bending their will to their Creator. God the Father is the creative power and she is reflected within our spiritual selves (in his likeness) and we are to reflect that love within the physical world. That’s the dynamic most people miss when they discover spiritual law. We are meant to live in love and harmony with the Divine, not cave to our lower selves and serve the Flesh. We are given a choice.


Through your mind’s eye visualize a temple being built where your heart is. Construct it however you like. I chose the mathematical Precision of a six-point star because it resonates with my soul. Once you visualize the temple in detail, ask Wisdom to come live inside you. Say it out loud. Repeat this until you meet Her.

Now, if it’s power and prestige you seek, you will never find Her. “Because into a soul that plots evil Wisdom does not enter, nor does she dwell in a body under debt of sin. (NAB- Wisdom 1:4)” Every practitioner who meditates eventually awakens to the flow of energy connecting all things. If your intentions are dark you will meet the shadow side of everything I’ve just discussed as we humans are dual in nature. This is where the left hand path either begins or ends so choose wisely.

Well, there you have it, Esoteric Christianity at it’s core.

I promise you I will share my specific meditative practices and how I’ve come to understand the chakras at some point. To my readers in the East, please understand that I have a profound respect for your spiritual wisdom and any misconceptions I may have are completely my own and in no way a reflection of the gurus who came before me.

Peace be with you all.

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